Listen up, you filthy animals, because this is the kind of batshit insanity that makes my blood boil and my typewriter scream. Nigel Farage, that smirking, pint-swilling poster boy for doing fuck-all, is out here proving that work is for suckers. This bastard’s allergic to effort, and yet he’s raking in cash like a slot machine with a broken lever. You wanna talk numbers? This bellend’s pulling £97,000 a month from GB News for 32 hours of flapping his gums, plus another £1.2 million a year from side hustles—writing columns, Cameo videos, and whatever else he can slap his name on. And that’s on top of his £91,346 MP salary for Clacton, a job he treats like a part-time internship he forgot to quit.
I’ve seen some grift in my time, but this? This is Olympic-level freeloading. The man’s got his MP gig in third place, behind his Reform UK ‘revolution’—which, let’s be real, is just a traveling circus of dog-whistle politics—and his real job: milking every corporate teat he can find. You ever wonder if those ‘consulting’ gigs and ‘speaking fees’ from random companies line up with his Reform campaign stops? I sure as hell do. Smells like a hustle so blatant it’d make a televangelist blush. Is he visiting candidates to push Reform, or is he just cashing checks from shadowy donors who want a piece of his brand? Follow the money, you idiots, because it’s always the money.
And the kicker? This is legal. Farage can skip 80% of parliamentary votes, hold zero face-to-face surgeries for his constituents, and jet off to America five times to kiss Trump’s ring, all while pocketing a full MP’s wage and expenses. How’s that not theft? If I showed up to my editor’s desk, filed one story a year, and spent the rest of my time shilling for crypto bros, I’d be out on my ass. But in Westminster? It’s just another Tuesday. The system’s rigged to let these leeches bleed the public dry while they cosplay as ‘men of the people.’ Farage’s not serving Clacton—he’s serving himself, and every pound he takes is a middle finger to the poor sods who voted for him.
This is why you’ve gotta dig into this, hold this frog faced fuckwit to account, people. The whole rotten machine that lets a grifter like Farage treat public office like a side gig while he’s out there building his personal empire. Get angry, get loud, and start asking: who’s paying him, where’s he going, and why the hell isn’t he doing his damn job? I’d rather trust a sewer rat with my taxes than this guy. At least the rat’s honest about what it’s scavenging.
If anyone has a problem with these facts, they can check them out: https://members.parliament.uk/member/5091/registeredinterests
Spider Thompson out, off to find a better side hustle.
+ There are no comments
Add yours